Sunday, May 6, 2012


Structure

 

Section 1: Intro

 

Section 2: Quote

 

Section 3:

 

The overall structure of the article and;

 

How the intro and quote usage play into the overall structure?



Section 1 Intro


The article’s intro fit into the category of what is been refer to as Delay intro, sub category teaser intro

What is Delay intro


The delayed intro is also called the buried lead.  It consists of two or more sentences or paragraphs and relies on contrast or surprise.  Calculated to raise expectations, it makes readers feel they must read on.  The danger is that instead of reading on readers simply will ask ‘so what?’ Care should be taken in using such intros in news stories.  That is why the delayed intro is more common in news features and colour stories.  The following example is from the 23~24 December 2000 Weekend Australian:
A can of salmon has achieved in the past week what many cyberprenurs have failed to do for years success on the Internet.
John West’s amusing canned salmon ad, featuring bear and a fisherman having a fight intended for British television only, flew via email around the world and drew an audience that well funded sites have only dreamt of. (Paraphrase from reading)

What is Teaser intro


In a teaser intro the key point is saved until later in the story.  The writer of a delayed intro is still attempting to grab the reader’s attention by tempting the read to read on.  The idea is to string the readers along until they are well into the story where the main news peg or main news point is given.  
Long Bay escapes Fred Nurk went for a surf yesterday and came face to face with an off duty police officer in bathers. (Paraphrase from readings)




Intro of the article

Tina Rinehart effectively put a gun to her own children’s heads by telling them they would go bankrupt if they didn’t agree to hand over control of the family’s multibillion dollar trust, the three eldest children claim.
Paragraph 1


Main Intro
Mislead the reader to believe in the existence of something that is not there, to achieve the aim of drawing the readers into reading the article.


Mislead the reader to believe that Tina Rinhart has [literally] put a gun to her own children’s head to force the children to give her control over the family’s billion dollar trust.  It is only till paragraph 4 did the article explain to the reader it is metaphorically.
Further documents from the legal battle over the future of the trust released yesterday reveal the deep fractures in Australia’s richest family after September 3 last year – the date on which Mrs Rinehart sent a letter to her children given them one business day to sign a new deed of agreement regarding the trust or face “financial ruin” in the form of a capital gains tax bill.
Paragraph 2


Extended intro
Work in coalition with paragraph 1.  Further mislead the reader to believe in the existence of something that is not there, to achieve the aim of drawing the readers into reading the article


By presenting information about the court case between the mother and children provide a perspective about the intensity of the conflict between the mother and children over this trust and extend of forcefulness, which Rinhart is using to force the children to sign the trust fund to her.


Working in coalition with paragraph 1.  It misleads the readers to believe that Rinhart is so forceful in forcing her children to sign the trust fund to her that she even went to the extent of conducting physical violence, which is [literally] point a gun at her children’s head.


In legal submissions, Mrs Rinehart’s three eldest children, john Hancokc, Bianca Rinehart and Hope Rinehart Welker describe their mother’s conduct as deceptive, manipulative, hopelessly conflicted and disgraceful”
Paragraph 3


Extended intro
the paragraph provided the reader with a statement where the article introduce to the readers with a perspective, in regards to how these children view their mother, a perspective that further increase the intensity, of the conflict between the children and the mother,


Work in coalition with paragraph 1, 2 and 3.  It mislead the readers to believe there is an intense conflict between mother and children, over the family trust fund and the conflict is so intense, that it eventually leads to the forceful mother [literally]putting a gun to the children’s head to force the children to hang the money to her.
They claimed: “The September 3 letter attached to the email on any fair reading comprised nothing less than a gun to the plaintiff benefifciaries’ heads, seeking to extract binding commitments that are contrary to their interests.
Paragraph 4


First Paragraph after the main and extended intro
Only now does the article explain to the reads that Gina Rinheart did not [literally] point a gun at the children’s head, but it is a [metaphorical] reference made by the children, but by this time the readers have been well drawn into the story.



Usage of quotes


The usage of quotes within the article fit into the category of what Ken Melzer refers to as Quote for Human colour and quote for authenticity

Quote for human interest


Keep an ear attuned to the way people talk.  Stay particularly alert for personal asides offered in ways that you write. (Melzer, 1997)

In short, your story’s quotations should show individual character stamps, each representing a style of expression distinctly different from the way you write.  Do that and your writing become a rainbow of colourful expression, rather than a dull monotone.  (Melzer, 1997)

Quote for authenticity


A personality story that discusses its celebrity subject’s shyness becomes more believable with a direct quote: “Yes,” says Mr. Big “I suffer agony in anticipation of meeting somebody for fear they won’t like me.” (Melzer, 1997)

In a similar vein, authenticity shows through quotes that reflect the jargon of the topic.  You show the former hobo talking in the jargon of his past: “there we were, a couple of bindle stiffs just off the red ball express, diming up on the stem.” it sounds authentic, though you may have to translate the meaning-hobos just off the fast fruit train, panhandling on Main Street. (Melzer, 1997)



They claim (children)‘The September 3 letter attached to the email on any fair reading comprised nothing less than a gun to the plaintiff beneficiaries’ heads, seeking to extract binding commitments that are contrary to their interests.”
“Stop the nonsense,” she said (mother) in an email “you are always saying you want a leadership role, but very sadly in the past you have taken the wrong decisions.”
“I’m so lost with all of this, don’t know what to do” she told Hope Rinehart Welker in an email on September 3
“I think he really does need to answer: ‘Why would he involve himself in a personal family business?” independent MP Tony Windsor said of
“Is he in the business of writing to everybody who has children who might be in some sort of dispute with their parents?”



1.       Present the readers with a perspective of the characteristics of individual characters, in relationship to the situation, as if we are witnessing the event ourselves, including the characters’
·         personality,
·         perspective
·         and psychological stats of the character
rather then been told to us by another character.  Thus the usage of quote includes the effect of quotes for human colour and quote for authenticity. 

2.       The usage of these quotes with these quotes thus leads to the effect of making the readers in some way feel as if they are watching the whole event unfold before their eye, as if they are watching a reality show version of a day time soap opera, rather than receiving this information second hand.




The overall structure of the article and how does the intro usage and quote usage fit into the structure of the article



Intro

Paragraph 1 (main intro)
and paragraph 2 and 3 (extended intro)

The intro played a huge part into the structure of the article, it draw the readers into the article by misleading the readers to believe that there are an intense conflict between a forceful mother and the children over huge sum of money and the conflict over the money has became so intense that it leads to a situation of physical violence, where the forceful mother literally put a gun to the children’s head to force them sign the money to her.  It is not until paragraph 4 that the article explains the act of pointing a gun to the head, is a metaphorical reference the children made, towards their mother’s forceful behaviour, not a literal act.

Paragraph 4
It is only now, in paragraph four did the article revealed the fact that the mother did not literally put a gun to the children’s head, but it is a metaphorical reference to some of their mother’s action, to force them to give them the money.

They claim “The September 3 letter attached to the email on any fair reading comprised nothing less than a gun to the plaintiff beneficiaries’ head, seeking to extract binding commitments that are contrary to their interests.”

Main Intro 

Paragraph 1

Mislead the reader to believe there is a literal act of a mother pointing a gun to the children’s head, where in reality it is a metaphorical reference.
Paragraph 2 and 3 (Body and extended intro)

Apart from been the extended intro of the article, where it assists the main intro in misleading the readers.  Paragraph 2 and 3 also played into the role of the body of the article, by presenting us the readers, with some information of the article.

Paragraph 5~ Paragraph 17 (Body)


1.       the article continue to present the readers with more information in regards to the story, but even more,
2.        started using quotes to present the readers with a perspective of the characteristics of individual characters, in relationship to the situation, including personality, perspective and psychological stats of the character, as if we are witnessing the event ourselves, rather then been told to us by another character.
3.        The usage of these quotes with these quotes thus leads to the effect of making the readers in some way feel as if they are watching the whole event unfold before their eye, as if they are watching a reality show version of a day time soap opera, rather than receiving this information second hand.


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